Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Nothin' to Talk Bout But Some Birthdays

Fuck apartment searching in NYC! Fuck it. Holy ballshit, what does it take to get some shitty ass small little place to keep my stuff while I'm handsomin' up the town. My lord, it is like going through the Mortal Kombat Tournament trying to get an apt in this fair town. Must be easier in Williamsburg or something, the hipsters always know best. Ok, thanks for letting me get that out. Onto our topic of the day.....

So with so much happin in the city these days, I find that it is important to stop and take a minute to recognize the simple things like birthdays. I could not help but notice that today there are a plethora of super celebrity birthdays. Here go's:

1) Daryl Hall - 57
This super star helped coin the phrase "blue eyed soul" with super molado singing sensation John Oates. Not sure if his partner is molado, or even if this is the spelling, but after seeing our 3rd birthday candidate.... he must be. This blue eyed phenom is still rocking strong in Akron, OH county fairs and promsies to be for years to come. Daryl Hall and his kind of black partner just put out a rocking new album......Here is what they have to say about it

Call it a masterpiece, a labor of love or the beginning of a new tradition, Daryl Hall & John Oates released "Home for Christmas" on October 3rd, a beautifully recorded and heartfelt Holiday album. Released on their own label U-Watch/DKE Records and distributed by ICON Music Entertainment Services.

"We wanted to do an album that expressed the true spirit of Christmas, that of peace, traditions, family and friends coming together," says Daryl Hall. "The songs, some familiar, but adapted to our style, others more obscure, along with two originals, are about ecstasy, grace, poignancy, love and, of course, soul."

Shut the fuck up and play Rich Girl for chrissake!

2) Luke Perry - 40
Ha Ha, over the hill. Mr. Perry is know best for his amazing portrayal of a zombie lyzard in the 1991 epic thriller "The Invasion". Holy mess of a movie. Incidentally Kim Cattrall also is in the movie so you know you are going to see another 40 year old's tits. Gross. Anyway, how did Sarah Jessica Parker ever get away with Sex in the City without showing her bombs. We only got to see the pasty ass red head's and aging whore Kim's. Happy Birthday Dylan, err Luke. I never watched 90210, I swear. Ok, kiss my ass........I had sisters!

3) U-God - 36
Go a'head, throw your Dubya's in the air and let out a long ass WUUUUUUUUUUU!
Thats right its a Wu Tang Birthday. Yet another member of the Wu-Tang Clan reaches the high regards of living through another year (ODB, much love). U-God is not the most famous of the Clan as he was the 8th member to release a solo album. Born Lamont Hawkins (f'in awsome name, don't even know why he goes by a alies honestly) U-God has also been known to rap under the white boy scarin' names Golden Arms, Lucky Hands, Baby U, 4 Bar Killer, and Master Pookums. You should be lucky if you are on the list for his slammin' b-day party at Lester Washington's Condo on Staten Island. Holla at the Ugliest Wu..... I didn't say that. Shit, I'm dead

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

"Holy Ballshit"? Nice. Real nice. I'm going to take that and adopt it as if it was my own (I think the rule is I site my source the first time I use it, after that its mine, right?)

stantonandorchard said...

U God is the shizz, handsome. don't go getting us all killed just cause dude isn't the pretty toney of the group.

Mr. God, I don't usually address people as such because mostly people address me as such (sorry God, just joking. not you u-God, but like God God, um, whichever god it is that you believe in dear reader, don't want to fucking offend anybody here) but I think you're cool and that verse you dropped on Triumph is sick. "Olympic torch flamin/ we burn soo sweet/ the thrill of victory/ the irony defeat..." Sick