Bring on Year #2

oh yeah, and check out this creative Graffiti by my apt........

jimmys diggin cats

friday is cat day, remember? REMEMBER?

anyways, you didn't think we'd just send you off into the weekend without a little more cats, did you? this one is an ode the show that helps me kill at least an hour every night. seriously, why don't they just rename discovery channel 'deadliest catch channel'? oh sure, there's other beauties like myth busters and man v. wild (BEAR!? sup my nikka) and, um, oh shark week and don't they have a week dedicated to volcanos?

who cares about that. all i want to hear is mike rowe make sweet love to my eardrums while gruff dudes scour the bering straits in search of that orange gold. (so cheezy)okay, bobsled out. happy fucken weekend hbcc, and tune in tomorrow or some time over the weekend as handsome weighs in with a very special one year anniversary post that is sure to have you in tears or seizures. PEACE

Another Cat Photo for the Weekend

POWERS........THE DUNE KITTEN

RRRREEEEOOOOWWWWWW

ima pay one day, just not right now

whats happening world? tired of all the cat photos here? i didn't think so.

first thing first for the NYC peeps: Travis America is performing live next week and it is your duty as an American with a capitol 'A' to come out and see him bring it.
TRAVIS MCGEE & THE REVELERS
May 30th, 2007
9PM
105 Eldridge Street
Between Broome and Grand Streets
LES b.itches

second, i've decided to grow a mustache. yeah, i know, that was hott like a few months ago and now its not, but i don't care. i march to the beat of a bobsled drummer (feel the rhythm!!) and if i want to grow my first mustache, then damnit i am. besides, handsome is coming to town on june 7th, so i need to be ready

third 'still not a player' just came on my office computer. i'm blasting it right
"hot tub! poppin bubbly" you know you're singing it
four i'm embarassed and just turned it down

five kickball tonight. psyched. and its not a frat, handsome, you fucking jerk

six i'm out of possibly amusing tidbits. maybe something will come to me
nope
okay
wait....
no, okay, that's it, i've got nothing
....
no you hang up
no you hang up
i love you
love you
weird
HBCC

A super dope homeboy from the Oaktown

So while my colleague is out spying on homeless people in his backyard and getting ready for the long hard road ahead, i've been enjoying the summer kickball style. adult kickball style. not adult like adult movies, but adults like grown ups enjoying a game we all used to rage on in third grade. and then going out to the bar afterwards, getting competely wasted like we used to in college and then making out in some kind of incestuous drunken orgy more akin to what we all enjoyed in high school (or what the greeks probably enjoyed in the greek ages except with less gay sex and sex in public). the only thing is a fascinating study in regression really, but my therapist says its helping me connect with my inner child, the one who didn't get nintendo even though like every other kid on the entire freaking block had one....JEEZ mom and dad.

anyways, we're talkin about kickball. i mean, kickball, i'm talking about kickball. my team is called the hammers. seriously. in a league where another team is called "john stamos is our dad", we're a bunch of tools. but, at least we're like the manliest of the manly tools. hammers hit shit and help mold the world. (well, maybe the latter can be said about stamos also, but that's for another discussion). im thinking this team name was like a default name or something, like john doe or username or

we have a messageboard for the league which i occassionally drop in on. now i wasn't always really into messageboards, but apparently you have to have sweeeeeet avatar. here's mine:see what i mean? sweetness. nothing can't touch the old hammer. unfortunately there's only like three classic shots of hammer in google images, so there wasn't much to choose from. but i think i done pretty good with this one here.

the big debate is: how much of a pussy are you for bunting in kickball? because, see, there's a rule that prevents you from charging a bunt until its been kicked, and its pretty much impossible to just throw people out at first, so a bunt is a sure way of getting on. so is it cheating? or using the rules to your advantage? and do you care if all the people you're playing against think you have a sticky, slimy vertical taco that hasn't been shaved in years cause you like to bunt....more to come on this

Grandpa's Got the Beer Goggles on Again

Just watching some wonderful Monday evening TV and a particular commercial caught my attention. Cialis.....you know, the boner pill. They were going over things to do or not do while taking the pharmaceutical hard on maker and I caught something funny. It says to not drink alcohol while taking Cialis. At first I was thinking that maybe the medicine would mix with the pill and cause a major medical problem or something. You know what, I think that is wrong. I think that they are scared that the already haven't fucked in 23 years crowd has enough on their hands with a brand new bonestick. In their test subjects they found the men would hardly keep thier hands off most ladies. Add in Booze to the mix (yes i highlighted Booze.....its a respect thing) and grandpa might be taking down something even he wouldn't want to.

Just a thought.........

Captain America is Handsome

I can't think of anything to write so I will just dictate the ramblings of the self defecating homeless man yelling outside my window:

"Fuck....Who the fuck?!?!?

grumblings of squander and insanity.......

You cock sucking fucker, Fuck you"

Get back here.!!!!! (somthing that i couldn't understand should be inserted here. I don't believe it was english)

Cock Sucker........scream.....scream.....yellll and finish with a moan"

That was an actual ranting from a real Venice Beach Insanobum about 3 minutes ago. You can't make this stuff up folks. I literally have to listen to this crap on almost a nightly basis. The homeless out here are of a different breed that I am used to. The New York Bums are much better behaved. I mean Big Apple Bums really understand their level of bummitude, go about their day happily eating halal cart leftovers, and sleep peacefully on the steps of http://www.sip-sak.com/. Note, this is a reference to my ole local homeless lady from the hatten that would drink 3-4 tall boys, pee herself and sleep peacefully at the "Sak". Incidentally, they serve up some pretty solid Turkish food if you are ever in the Turtle Bay Neighborhood. Incidentally x2, kiss my ass - I heard your cocky hipster laced comments over there Brooklyn!

Unlike the well groomed hatten bums, Insanobum outside my window is anything but well behaved. Noooooo, he doesn't think he is a bum.....shit, he thinks he is some sort of 2 Live-Crew Aristotle. He isn't the only one either. The bums out here think they need to share the infinate whisdom that helped secure their place in this wonderful world. Sweet, as I am writing this some skaters just got into a shouting match with the bum. Who the hell needs Time Warner (bastards)! This is not just a random occurance either. I hear this shit many nights a week. The best is when I have someone over and the bums start up......the look on their faces is classic. Anyhow, I got noting else. I didn't even really ever have this to be honest. Damn! I am going to go watch the bums pee on the dumpster outside of my window. Check out my view:

you must be another handsome boy graduate

HANDSOME BOBSLED ORIGINAL: CATS OFF CAPE NANFUCKET

really slow day at work today

i wanna make this funky for you

HANDSOME BOBSLED ORIGINAL: INTRODUCING BIG CAT HEAD

Friday is for cats
you can't tell me thats
no true, boo
me, you, your cousin too
stealin lines
bitin rhymes
sittin at work
wastin time
cats on bodies
bobsled freakin hotties
handsome, captain
la, la, la
HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND
blah blah blah

my best friend stephen at the home depot

yeah, s'been a while since i posted. but since i drank a shitload of beer tonight and i made out with a random girl adn now im listeing to grateful dead adn wathing whacked out sports on tv, i figured id way in with a little photo fo something fhit. shit fuck fshit fudkc fushit fuvck fudsk;aj f;inaisn; shit i'm drink

MIA in LA n' NYC

Sorry for the lack of posting lately. Bobsled and I are presently recentering ourselves through an extensive Yoga and Scientology Program. Oh yeah.......I also have no internet at my apt as the guy I was stealing it from just moved. I miss the hatten'........there were just soooo many optinons for stealing internet. Guess I should evolve to LA life and just start stealing cars.....

California Voodoo - Now With Air Conditioning

Hotel Cafe, not really a name that you would associate with a night out raging to some crazy music is it? Well I do now. Last week I finally found an old friend's number who lives out here in the LAaaaa and gave him a shout out. He suggested I meet up with him at the Hotel Cafe as Tom Morello was doing an accustic set under the name "The Night Watchman". Diggity, lets check out some music, I haven't done shit out here and was in need for something, anything to sustain my musical needs. $10 at the door and I was in for the show. Hotel Cafe is pretty much in the center of Hollywood Hell. I nearly ran over 2 bums, and a flock of gay Mexican's with cowboy hats while circling the block looking for parking. The cronotons did not make the situation any safer for the booze filled pedestrians. Took me a minute to get into the place as it has a false front that faces the street but you have to go around back through this alley to get into the joint. Layout was pretty hot, there was a small bar with an ajoining cafe room as you enter the Club. The lighting was dim, the walls were of exposed brick, and swaths of red velvet hung about. I was in some sort of Musical Narnia. To the back of the room were two double swinging doors that led to the "venue".

A Kettle Rocks with a Beam Back greeted me and quickly ushered me into the show. Tom was already playing an accustic Bulls on Parade as I entered. He was thrashing about as if he was playing with Rage or Audio.. but it was just him and his shitty little guitar with Nylon strings. I was taken back at first but found it to be highly entertaining. Tom was very jovial and was dressed like Stanly Spadowski as he MC'd the event between songs. Tom ended his set and stated that we were in for a treat as he had some special guests for the evening. We were all a bit confused and curious who it could be. At this point someone identified Zack Delaroca (former lead singer for Rage) in the crowd. Everyone was all pumped. At this point let me comment on the crowd. There were about 200 - 250 of us in this tiny little venue and everyone of us was partying. This was one of the best small venue crowds I have had the pleasure of being a part of. Lot of screaming and heckling Tom, who love it and threw it back in all of their faces. There was serious energy in the room. I couldn't help thinking that this was a fun little night out and hoped I might recognize one of the guests...........well, I did.

As Tom finished his set he made fun of some hecklers before introducing his first guest of the evening. When Ben Harper was introduced the place went nuts. Now, I am not the hugest fan of Ben or the slower music per se but to see him unexpectedly at this small venue was surely hot. He belted out about 4 tunes that sounded pretty amazing. I had seen him at festivales (pronounced fes-tiv-ahl-ees) and it was notably different hearing him wail in this small little room. Not bad, I knew a guest. yay. So Ben finished up and Tom announced there were several more guests to come. Word? Word! Tom introduced the next band: Extreme. It was rediculous, some 80's hair band was now taking the stage. I could not stop my laugher. They played an exectric set that included some Zeppelin Tunes and after much begging by Tom Morello closed with a rousing "Get the Funk Out". I am not going to say that this was any real musical moment for me but it was pretty damn fun to be bouncing around the place to 80's metal. Incidentally, the guitarist Nuno Bettencourt was pretty sick. After Extreme's set Alice and Chains was announced to be taking the stage. Everyone was calling beniecles to this and none took it seriously. Until the entire band backed onto this tiny stage to play an accusitc set. I am again not a huge fan but this was actually the shit seeing them just come out and blow everyone's head off. They played some favorites (i.e "Down in a Hole") and then Tom got on stage, asked them to plug in and played a nasty few songs with the band. This was probably the best part of the whole evening.......accept for what happened next.

So Tom decided he wanted every damn person on the stage for the final few songs. It took the crew 15 minutes to actually all get onstage, plugged in and find enough room to stand/play. The whole process was very laughable. Tom Morello announced that the kids in the front sitting a the few small cafe tables in front of the stage had to get the hell up. This would prove helpful for me in the coming minutes. So after everyone was packed on stage, Tom invited up the final guest to the stage. B-Real! Yeah, that guy from Cypress Hill. He was sooo tore up when he came on the stage. Someone asked him to tell a joke and his reply was "I got no jokes but have some serious Cronic!" and everyone busted into Rock Superstar. It was fun as hell. The small crowd exploded and I started jumping around like some white wanna be gangster. B-Real acknowleged my bog hit motion to him several times but never broke stride. After the tune he said he was gonna freestyle for a bit which was very out of character for him. He laid down some lyrics but was obviously too blazed to really tear it up. At this point I pretended to tie my showe and stuck my head under one of the vacated tables to kiss the cats. Wow, it helped. They continued to play "Kill a Man" and finally "Hits from the Bong>Insane in the Membrane". This shit was soo much fun. None of the bands were my favorite but the whole experience was one of the best. Noone knew what was going to happen and inevitably the roof lifted off the motherfucker. The show ended by everyone clearing out quickly with a few of us lazy asses stayed to have another beer at the back bar. That turned out to be a good move as I got to hang out with all the guys that just performed.

Overall, this was one of the most fun music shows I have been to in recent history. It really summed up what the fuck it is that they do out here in the Hollywood. Rock is still alive and kicking. Anyhow, I hear that this same type of show will happen the next 3 Tuesday's at the Hotel Cafe so if you are out here in the Laaaaaaa, Check It Out. It is all for a good name in raising $$ for the homeless and is sponsored by Axis of Justice. Look how blazed B-Real looks even on my shitty little camera phone....

its my birth(f)day and i'll rap if i want to

April 11th, the most important day in my life. It's a beautiful day here in NYC, hope the same can be said where you're at.

A little Wednesday afternoon rap courtesy of MF Doom. AND!!!! the first HBCC MP3 share (at least, I hope I did this right) Enjoy and don't resell it or any of that other stuff that might get us in trouble or detract from income for incredible artists...

One of my favorite verses in print, cause it's my birthday and i'll post rap lyrics if i want to:

How Doom hold heat, and preach non-violence?
Shhh, he 'bout to start the speech, c'mon, silence
On one scary night, I saw the light
Heard a voice that sound like Barry White said "Sure you're right"
Don't let me find out who tried to bite
They better off goin to fly a kite in a firefight
during tornado time with no coat then I caught ya
Wrote the book on rhymes, a note from the author
With no headshot, he said it's been a while
Got a breadwinner style to get a inner child up in to smile
And that's no exaggeration
The doctor told a patient "It's all in your imagination negro"
Ahh, what do he know?
About the buttery flow, he need to cut the ego
Trippin, to date the Metal Fellow been rippin flows
since New York plates was ghetto yellow with broke blue writing
This is too exciting
Folks leave out the show feelin truly enlightened
They say "The Villain been spittin enough lightning
to rock shock the Boogie Down to Brighton," aight then

Listen: Raid - MF Doom featuring Medaphoar
Buy: Madvillainy

James Dean of the Bobsled Team

Who The Fuck Said Smoking Isn't Cool?????

Once Again Bobsled Reinvents Slick

While Puffin' On A Cancer Stick

Then He Pulled This Shit...............

Stuff it in your Easter Basket and Smoke it. More pictures of Bobsled in Venice to come.

YAY

HAPPY EASTER

Ole Handsome here trying to get out of work on the holiest of fridays. Again, I am fucked by the internet gods and am awaiting internet at the apt so you will have go get by with only Bobsled (who has been on fire lately......my opinion, certainly not fact) and a quick catpost from work. I got a whole roll of hot beef for you so keep checkin back and you may catch an injection.......Enjoy the beach, peace to y'all back east:

Easter is dedicated to LA's most common profession. God Told Me SO!

shame on you when you step through to

and the alabama feline award for most best dressed human goes to kathy strickland of tuscaloosa

What a freaking CA hangover right now. S'all rainy and gloomy here in NYC right now. But I got out to check out this band, Merit, last night at Arlene's Grocery and they made it quite alright to be back here in the city. 'Cuse kids always up to no good. All kinds of Nada Surf and Sonic Youth influences, imho. If it hadn't been for the bass players brand spanking new white pumas (sorry dude, you rocked though), I could have convinced myself it was Nineteen Ninety Somethingorather.

Check them out at Pianos in May if you live in the city. If you don't, peep the Myspace and tell them how much you need them in YOUR town (San Diego State University, I see you checking in, sup).

saw this in LAX. god people freak me out

A couple of observations on TV: Deadliest catch is back at it. Read our ode to Mike Rowe, also host of Dirtiest Jobs. Anyways, before me and the Senor hit up the aforementioned show, we sat on the couch to hang with the Dan K. and watch a little of the tube. But it quickly became apparent that we had something of a dilemma on our hands. See, two dudes, hanging out, small NYC apartment, one couch, kinna awkward, kinna not. Gotta throw on some SportsCenter to get the Testosterone in the room flowing, right?

Except, to my dismay, I flip on ESPiN and find…women’s basketball?! WTF?! So, here’s the question: two dudes, hanging out, is it okay to watch women’s basketball (even though they suck) cause it’s the principle of having ESPiN on? Or are there sometimes when its just not acceptable for dudes to be watching ESPiN and instead should watch My Super Sweet 16 on MTV or The Agency on VH1? (I KNOW some of you know what I’m talking about)

Shit, so I think we watched deadliest catch, then maybe, um, I don’t even know. I was barely even alive for the show when we finished that little session.

get high

Being that’s its Wednesday, take some time to read up on what some of the people who give us love from time to time:
Travis McGee & The Revelers
Passion of the Weiss
Velvet Sea
You Look Really Great
Bourbon Samurai
Misguided Misadventures in NYC
Low Concept
R2K
Down With Detroit
this is what we do now

Also, check the myspace page cause we post completely different nonsense to that sometimes too. THANKS

Reunited and it feels so good

Handsome Beach, Captain Commando

a poem:

hertz one way rental
vegas to L-A
15 up and over mountains
the 10 to end the day

handsome west coast livin
bobsled visit for the 'kend
dude lives two blocks from the beach
and like a million taco stands

kicked at a club friday night
ladies were all so uptight
saturday drank at the 4100 club
then smoked on the way home, just right

now i'm back in nyc
handsome's chillin on his own again
but we'll be back together in april
to bring you more shenanigans

until then...

HBCC Ode to Vegas: Day 4

tonight i got to have dinner at a place called pampas at the former aladdin casino and hotel, now the planet hollywood casino and hotel. sort of a trend in the opposite direction of things in vegas becoming more sophisticated. but dinner was a brazilian steak place, where they freaking bring you meat and more meat and more meat and more meat and a jamesons and a glass of red wine and chicken and sausage and red wine and jamesons and water and i've gotta go.

the theory that i came up with today is this: when you come to vegas, you find a lot of really nice shops in places like the venetian and ceasar's palace. places you might find on 5th avenue or rodeo drive. the problem is, these places are much more easily accessible than the aformentioned locations. so you have the kenneth coles and bcbgs and other nice desinger shops i can't recall now being frequented by the guy with the tucked in reebok t-shirt and dewalt racing hat from arkansas. it's nice...it's just frequented by dirtballs. and therein is the paradox that is las vegas.

anyways, vegas at night is beautiful. really. my favorite movie memory of vegas has to be the end scene of ocean's eleven (the george clooney version) where they are all standing in front of the bellagio watching the lake and then one by one walk off. there is just something about it that captures the beauty of vegas that it might actually be if you were to bomb all the tourists with their gigantic test-tube drinks, or whatever teh fuck those things are.

anyways, more photos. hope you're enjoying them. i'm stayin in henderson tonight which is a completely new experience and devoid of slot machines, card tables and fun things that rob you. thanks duggs, i owe you at least $40 and a 40oz.

fuck, conan is a repeat tonight, even though my morning jacket is the musical guest. check some photos while i get up to go flex my pecks in the mirror...

fountain in front of the paris casino and hotel

flamingo: the casino is old by the marquee is timeless

ceasar's palace is massive. when you stay there, the wake up call picks up with, "HAIL noble guest..." serious shit

arch de motherfucking triumph. i love lindsey lohan

oh shit and i would be remissed not to mention the free smut that you can pick up and random points along the way. they look just like newspaper dispensers. except, instead of news, you get nudes...hello? hello? is this thing on? sweet pandas...

HBCC Ode to Vegas: Day 3

fuck you

I have to say that I love the Mirage, but I hate the dealers here. Fuck you I want my money back, bitches.

But I did meet some lovely ladies tonight, who turned out to be from the D! Detroit WHAT! Well, okay, Novi, but close enough. Turns out though the hot one has like down syndrome or something (some weird speech impediment) AND a boyfriend in Connecticut (fucking bitch), the decent looking one was actually cool, and then there was the token fat one who was like leaning a little too hard into me and who loved the tigers (!!!) but was really kinna fat (sad face).

In the end I chose cards over these three lovely girls, one of which was visiting for her first time (the hot one with a mental defect) and all three of whom were not staying at my hotel (too drunk to walk to the Tropicana…who the fuck stays there anyways?) plus they were all excited to be in vegas. I was all like, er, what day is it? I’m down 40, gotta go put in some work.

And fuck, I did okay at the table. I even started putting the chips away in my pocket, which means, hey, when the chips on the table are gone, you walk the fuck away jackass. But eventually I started losing, then got pissed, then started pulling them out again, then contemplated throwing them at the fucking panda bear dealing. I hated it with every fiber of my body.

Then the woman bringing drinks who could have easily been my grandmother with Alzheimer's (god bless you grandma) didn’t bring the right drink with her. Mind you, I waited for her stupid ass (she brought a fucking corona, WITH a lime. how dare you?!) and lost another $10 waiting on her slow ass to bring the drinks. So I paid $10 for nothing. No, not nothing. I paid $10 to get really pissed the fuck off and come back to my room to blog.

Fuck, Vegas is soooooo fucking cool…

Here are some shitty photos of fuck all bullshit fucking cockayassas (btw, tonight on Anderson cooper 360: using cattle prods to stop kids with autism. then the chick reporting is like, "so i decided to try it for myself." then the old woman, the mother, shocks her and the reporter is like "OHHHH, its not pleasant, its not pleasant..." So fucking sweet. Ocean’s Eleven is fucking cocayassas)

fuck you

fuck you

you're cool

fuck you. i'm out

HBCC Ode to Vegas: Day 2

home of the runnin rebs

got picked up at 5:45am. JFK>LAX>delayed flight>LAS>cab line. for anyone who's ever been to vegas, you know that the cab line is infuriating. i mean, there are slot machines in the airport. so from the second you deplane, all you're thinking is, "let's go make some money." of course, that's short lived as you get to the baggage claim where some imbecile is dragging ass on the baggage chute and then you step outside to a cab line that makes no less than 10 switchbacks and usually takes no less than 30 minutes to get to the front of.

All the time you're dying to go get in on all the cool shit you just saw in the airport: strippers, clubs, gambling, david hasselhoff in mel brooks' the producers, carrot top, manilow...where did i lose you? anyways, the cab line could be one of the most efficient you've ever witnessed as there is just an endless line of cabs filing into the airport.

then you hit the cab and they've got these books for all the cool shit you can do in town. the real secret is to tell the cabbie you're in town to have a good time (i.e. a phish show maybe) then you might get a little glimpse into the REAL las vegas. try it some time.

anyways, you make your way in the cab through the ghetto before getting to the strip. along the way, you might see things like:

something for the ladies (and senor sexy)

something for the homeys

something for the pirates (ARRRRR)

really though, they're building a gold city out here. it's a little freaking ridiculous

more treasure island, cause its kinna cool looking

and the wynn. cause its just bad ass

anyways, more to come, a few photos for now