Adventures of Henry the HBCC Hedgehog

Henry Parsons was a Hedgehog. Henry happens to be one of the baddest hogs' I have met since movin out here. I actually met Henry at a work retreat at the Luxe Hotel on Sunset but thats a different story. At first I really didn't think that much of Henry but he really turned out to be a cool cat......errr sorry hedgehog. So me and The Frey were wonderin' what to do on a Sunny Monday off in the LAAAaaaaaa. Well, I hadn't done the tourist thing since coming out here so shit, lets give that a try (Horay!).

So as we were gettin ready to load into Lequisha, Henry was like "Yo bitches, what about me". Well, hell Henry.................lets roll. To Hollywood we go!!!! After parking at the center of Middle America Tourist Bliss I get a bit excited. As we emerge from the undergarage the 90+ temperature starts to create tribute to Louisiana in my designer jeans. There is a guy dressed like The Cat in the Hat who must be very very envious of my jeans. I feel better. So not to get too sappy but we went to Mann's Chinese Theater. Henry picked out his favorite actor for a photo:

I have a nice photo of Steven Segal's square also. I will get that one up too, I know HBCC readers are rabid for a Segal Flick. Marked for death was the shit. I digress....so after a quick neslte tollhouse shop stop, watchin batman, darth vader, wonder woman, sponge bob, minnie mouse, another batman, and another wonderwoman we rolled to Griffith Park. Damn nice park I must say. A friend from West Point was golfing with some buddies and was giving us his Dodgers Tix for the night. Against the Nat's! Goooooooo DC. Holla East Coast. Game was mad fun however, the Dodger Dogs were quite disappointing. Luckily the Gordon Biersch Garlic Fries saved the day. That and a few Tall Boys. Anyhow, the Dogers won after bringing in Takashi Saito and it was the shit. That boy tossed a few 95 mile an hour heaters. Parsons was pleased...

Word, Tourist day with The Frey in LA. Oh yeah, we got some cotton candy and I rocked out some Selleck impressions..... (note Giants Hat, Down with the Redskins!)

Oh and Double yeah, here's Segal's cocky ass footprints.........what an Ass

California Voodoo - Now With Air Conditioning

Hotel Cafe, not really a name that you would associate with a night out raging to some crazy music is it? Well I do now. Last week I finally found an old friend's number who lives out here in the LAaaaa and gave him a shout out. He suggested I meet up with him at the Hotel Cafe as Tom Morello was doing an accustic set under the name "The Night Watchman". Diggity, lets check out some music, I haven't done shit out here and was in need for something, anything to sustain my musical needs. $10 at the door and I was in for the show. Hotel Cafe is pretty much in the center of Hollywood Hell. I nearly ran over 2 bums, and a flock of gay Mexican's with cowboy hats while circling the block looking for parking. The cronotons did not make the situation any safer for the booze filled pedestrians. Took me a minute to get into the place as it has a false front that faces the street but you have to go around back through this alley to get into the joint. Layout was pretty hot, there was a small bar with an ajoining cafe room as you enter the Club. The lighting was dim, the walls were of exposed brick, and swaths of red velvet hung about. I was in some sort of Musical Narnia. To the back of the room were two double swinging doors that led to the "venue".

A Kettle Rocks with a Beam Back greeted me and quickly ushered me into the show. Tom was already playing an accustic Bulls on Parade as I entered. He was thrashing about as if he was playing with Rage or Audio.. but it was just him and his shitty little guitar with Nylon strings. I was taken back at first but found it to be highly entertaining. Tom was very jovial and was dressed like Stanly Spadowski as he MC'd the event between songs. Tom ended his set and stated that we were in for a treat as he had some special guests for the evening. We were all a bit confused and curious who it could be. At this point someone identified Zack Delaroca (former lead singer for Rage) in the crowd. Everyone was all pumped. At this point let me comment on the crowd. There were about 200 - 250 of us in this tiny little venue and everyone of us was partying. This was one of the best small venue crowds I have had the pleasure of being a part of. Lot of screaming and heckling Tom, who love it and threw it back in all of their faces. There was serious energy in the room. I couldn't help thinking that this was a fun little night out and hoped I might recognize one of the guests...........well, I did.

As Tom finished his set he made fun of some hecklers before introducing his first guest of the evening. When Ben Harper was introduced the place went nuts. Now, I am not the hugest fan of Ben or the slower music per se but to see him unexpectedly at this small venue was surely hot. He belted out about 4 tunes that sounded pretty amazing. I had seen him at festivales (pronounced fes-tiv-ahl-ees) and it was notably different hearing him wail in this small little room. Not bad, I knew a guest. yay. So Ben finished up and Tom announced there were several more guests to come. Word? Word! Tom introduced the next band: Extreme. It was rediculous, some 80's hair band was now taking the stage. I could not stop my laugher. They played an exectric set that included some Zeppelin Tunes and after much begging by Tom Morello closed with a rousing "Get the Funk Out". I am not going to say that this was any real musical moment for me but it was pretty damn fun to be bouncing around the place to 80's metal. Incidentally, the guitarist Nuno Bettencourt was pretty sick. After Extreme's set Alice and Chains was announced to be taking the stage. Everyone was calling beniecles to this and none took it seriously. Until the entire band backed onto this tiny stage to play an accusitc set. I am again not a huge fan but this was actually the shit seeing them just come out and blow everyone's head off. They played some favorites (i.e "Down in a Hole") and then Tom got on stage, asked them to plug in and played a nasty few songs with the band. This was probably the best part of the whole evening.......accept for what happened next.

So Tom decided he wanted every damn person on the stage for the final few songs. It took the crew 15 minutes to actually all get onstage, plugged in and find enough room to stand/play. The whole process was very laughable. Tom Morello announced that the kids in the front sitting a the few small cafe tables in front of the stage had to get the hell up. This would prove helpful for me in the coming minutes. So after everyone was packed on stage, Tom invited up the final guest to the stage. B-Real! Yeah, that guy from Cypress Hill. He was sooo tore up when he came on the stage. Someone asked him to tell a joke and his reply was "I got no jokes but have some serious Cronic!" and everyone busted into Rock Superstar. It was fun as hell. The small crowd exploded and I started jumping around like some white wanna be gangster. B-Real acknowleged my bog hit motion to him several times but never broke stride. After the tune he said he was gonna freestyle for a bit which was very out of character for him. He laid down some lyrics but was obviously too blazed to really tear it up. At this point I pretended to tie my showe and stuck my head under one of the vacated tables to kiss the cats. Wow, it helped. They continued to play "Kill a Man" and finally "Hits from the Bong>Insane in the Membrane". This shit was soo much fun. None of the bands were my favorite but the whole experience was one of the best. Noone knew what was going to happen and inevitably the roof lifted off the motherfucker. The show ended by everyone clearing out quickly with a few of us lazy asses stayed to have another beer at the back bar. That turned out to be a good move as I got to hang out with all the guys that just performed.

Overall, this was one of the most fun music shows I have been to in recent history. It really summed up what the fuck it is that they do out here in the Hollywood. Rock is still alive and kicking. Anyhow, I hear that this same type of show will happen the next 3 Tuesday's at the Hotel Cafe so if you are out here in the Laaaaaaa, Check It Out. It is all for a good name in raising $$ for the homeless and is sponsored by Axis of Justice. Look how blazed B-Real looks even on my shitty little camera phone....